Elections 2009 in SA

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

I got this brilliant Idea from Atul who happened to just tweet it forward. But suddenly it makes huge sense. So here is my pitch for “Elections’ 2009 in South Africa”. This addressed to the huge audience of all the Manmohan Singh, Mayawati, Mulayam Singh Yadavs, and Arun jaitleys of the world. Instead of moving the IPL Season-2 out of India, let’s move Elections 2009 out of India. Now the obvious question you would ask is why?

Oh please don’t hesitate or get embarrassed nobody expected you to know this one, as a matter of fact they don’t expect you to anything except the profound expertise in your area of “How to fool the people to fill your coffers with Tax Payers Money”

So I give you 5 very valid reasons that why Elections-2009 should be moved to South Africa-

1- You know it would be a huge popularity thing for all you political parties. You know I am not sure what would my kaam wali bai, or the Ramu kaka who brings the milk daily from the village with the broadband you are going to provide when he doesn’t has a computer to use it. But I am sure he definitely can use a trip on an airplane to a Phoren Land. You know this can be a huge popularity contest; you know all parties can choose their favorite destination. Given the political and social biography of the candidates I am sure at least the exotic locations would be an incentive for people to decide on which party to cote for.

2- Instead of spending huge amounts on campaign like Jaagore.com. Just advertise Vote and get a free trip to South Africa. I am sure this would be a huge crowd puller for the elections and we might see the electoral voting percentages going up to unheard levels.

3- Another benefit of having the elections abroad will be, all the goons that any political party would have hired to capture booths or vandalize during election time would be denied Visa because of criminal records. This would lead to either a peaceful election or political parties hiring fresh breed of goons giving the fresh goons an overseas opportunity to start their career, which would be huge given the shortage of good jobs given the global recession (for further brownie points we can prevent foreign nationals to apply for these goony jobs)

4-Come to think of it I keep falling in love with this Idea, Now that the MLAs have already decided that they would bring the Royal Tradition of Hunting back to India to ensure the endangered species are extinct. It would be a glorious opportunity to tie a Wildlife Safari to give the citizens to understand the aura and prowess of their self proclaimed king, that what huge and dangerous animals they hunted. I am sure they won’t be any left as number of MLA’s would in most probabilities outnumber the Rhino’s in the Kaziranga national park.

5- Last but not the least it would bring back the “South African Premier League” back to India as “Indian Premier League- Season-2” and Lalit Modi & the IPL gang will spare the Indian audience from a series of “The Game goes international advertisements”

So you see it is a very sensible decision to move Elections’2009 to South Africa. Why SA? Well they anyways have their elections in a few days, they don’t mind IPL happening with elections so I am sure they won’t mind an election dry run also before their final elections.

Disclaimer: This post is written entirely for humor and fun. It does not reflect in any way, authors view on democracy or the election process or anything about the constitutional process.

Posted by Prats at 3:26 PM