Ginger & Cardamom

Memoirs of 6 Weeks

There has been a trail of events that has put my life on a roller coaster ride, I have been too lazy all this while to post anything on this blog. The only justice I can do is to post a memoir and mentioning snippets of my life…

SOLD!!! Auction Closed-

Finally this sheep is sold to, Infosys Technologies. The experience was so good, Two years dreaming IT, and trying to living the dream. Finally I am part of the great organization. It has not long when I used to talk about the great Global Delivery Model, or the Zero Debt Company, or the Millionare Driver of the founder himself, or the splendid cash reserves all with such awe and now I am going to be part of this great legacy. I will have a chance to live what Thomas Friedman talks about as “The World is Flat”. I am afraid will I be lost in the crowd of the 55000 people who will be around me or will I be affecting the NASDAQ 100 Index. A lot of questions makes life exciting because I know equal number of answers would be coming by very soon.

Resolutions-

I plan to do following things in this New Year. When I say I plan, it is quite clearly understood that they might fail and they are there in the first place to provide me a metrics of how much I missed.

1- Read twice the number of books that I did last year. I know this would be a state of Ideal Utopia but this comes in the light of that after being place I do not intend to slog myself ass of for the MBA curriculum and also if I can predict odd with Infosys predictability, there would be a high probability that I might get to spend some time on bench, which I intend to utilize for constructive purposes not for forwarding mails ( but I am assured that these odds are not in my favour).

2- Keep touch with friends- Will keep touch with old friends, will call people write emails and letters.

3- Will not help people at my own cost and allow them to enjoy their lives at my expense

4- Save money for contributing generously for Help Prats Get Rich Quickly Fund.

5- I will try and respect other view points than the right view point (which is obviously mine)

6- Will drive in a more sane manner, and clean my bike ever weekend (I have already missed two in the time between I thought and I am writing this)

7- Will not give anyone advice on their love life, and will apologize people from my past who are into a relationship and are cursing me to make their relationship work (Yes some are looking forward to break my head for all obvious reasons)

8- Will cut down on coffee, cold drinks, pizza, burgers, Chinese (is anything else left, yes a good question is what I will be living for)

9- Will exercise regularly at least one hour a day.

10- Follow all this to maximum time of the year possible.

Adieu!! Till the next post :-)

Betty & Veronica

I have recently being giving ears to two of my very close friends, Betty and Veronica (I am not the Archie between them, they have two different Archie for each one of them) Some times the situation is so interesting that I can’t help laughing at the irony of life. The life is so similar to fiction and a stark contrast it provides at times is really interesting.

Betty is always the one who loves, the one who is ready to give in and ready to go that extra mile to make the relationship work. A cute simple bubbly kind of a girl who would remain cheerful and would always be worried that if she would have her Archie or not. The problem with Betty is Archie likes her as a friend, thinks really high of her and he would do anything if she needs help. The only problem here is this is not enough to start a relationship, a relationship requires a lot more than just being there. This is where the problem arises when Betty asks a fundamental question; if there can be someone else then why not me? What is the problem with me? Why someone else over and above me? The only answer to this question is that world is not binary, the relationships and emotions do not work that way. I always say that I execute my relationships very practically. I know what I am into but the truth is that there are times when I have done things which in most of my sanest explanation were insanity. This is not because I am imbalanced or something it is just that the co-existence of Love & Insanity is not a mere chance but a law of nature.

Veronica is a total contrast to what Betty is though similar in a lot of aspects but posing a stark difference also. Veronica is the one who has decided that Archie is her guy, and she owns him. She will make sure that he remains his guy. She is completely laid back and expects Archie to do travel that extra mile for the sake of relationship. Aware of the fact that even if he goes that extra mile there is no end to it, doesn’t find it sane. Veronica on the other hand knowing the end would trade everyday a little just to get the moment of pep with Archie and would stall the relationship to a day further and then a day more and another. The problem here is Archie doesn’t left with much his life is answerable to Veronica. The interesting thing is why he should be able to answerable to her, when there are no long term commitments. Veronica on the other hand would ask questions like how can he be so oblivious to me? How can he think of someone else? The problem here is she is not willing to accept the fact that he does not belongs to her from the moment they disintegrated their future. A relationship is not a day to day trade which you keep on executing but a long term investment which you sow in initial years and reap later. If you start reaping before watering the roots properly the relationship would only be only bark with no solid trunk & roots to support from inside.

When I listen to them, I feel touched by the conviction of emotions be it Betty or Veronica especially when I know they are not heading towards what they want. All I can do is to suggest them the right path, but sometimes I question myself that am I capable enough to do it? Do I really understand the sea of emotions with them? Would I be doing the same thing if I were in there place? The questions can never be answered because I can never be at there place because I am not what they are, the only solace for me is that what I tell them is what I really believe and my honest wish to see them happy all through out their life. Best of luck mates for whatever you do in life, I always wish you get what you want and a bit more.

Technorati Profile

this is my technorati profile

My Problems with Strategy

Strategy is a very nice small word defined by Webster dictionary as “1 a (1) : the science and art of employing the political, economic, psychological, and military forces of a nation or group of nations to afford the maximum support to adopted policies in peace or war (2) : the science and art of military command exercised to meet the enemy in combat under advantageous conditions b : a variety of or instance of the use of strategy
2 a : a careful plan or method : a clever stratagem b : the art of devising or employing plans or stratagems toward a goal
3 : an adaptation or complex of adaptations (as of behavior, metabolism, or structure) that serves or appears to serve an important function in achieving evolutionary success”.

I feel in the current scenario it is one of the ill treated and demeaned word, specially where my fellow “HumBheeHain”(read MBA) comrades. Now after seeing the summer project titles of many of my fellow beings I have come to utter dislike for this word. I don’t know why but even my summer project title also includes the word (ps: yes I made the title) and is the most frequently occurring word in my resume as well. Getting back to the point that why I would not want to be associated with anything that has something related to this generic word of “strategy”.

1- It is too easy and non-challenging; almost every B-school student does it in his summer internship after the first year. You know things like “Strategy Formulation”, “Strategy Evolution” and other things of sorts.

2- Every company on the block does it; everyone seems to have it, more or less on the similar line. Everyone talks about customers, service, growth, market leader etc. even the ones who file for the bankruptcy. So why to be involved with one which is not the differentiator.

3- Once can not make their strategy independently without the help of someone. Either they need summer interns from the business schools or the glorified strategic consultants which are flocking our campuses on day to day basis. So it is a job from the lower end of the value chain which can easily be outsourced.

4- It partners us with our own competitors and might lead to risks. For example both Wipro & TCS are a strategic partner to General motors which also make them strategic partner to each other. I assume that strategy would be following the transitive laws of multiplication. After all strategy should be objective in nature.

5- Another thing which really irritates me about this word is it starts with an S (Read : ass) and ends in Y (Read: Why). May be because who starts it is a real donkey in himself and some why’s are always left in the end. Well why do I need an ass to make a plan which in the end would still leave some why? I swear I have no clue.

6- When I search in google the “strategy failure” I get more than 3 times more results from when I search “strategy success”. Now why would I like to spend my time doing something which is more associated with failure than to success.

8- If I rearrange the letters of the word strategy the words I get are grayest, gyrates, & targets all three such depressing words so now you would know how much depressing league this words belong to.

9- Another reason is that strategies are sometimes so stupid and they make you wonder if it is worth it, like some of you are wondering over my attention grabbing strategy to miss seven on the numbering list and cursing my strategy to gain attention

10- The only thing that is good with strategy is sometimes it works for no apparent reason, like some of you are looking up paying close attention to the crap I have written to see if I have really missed out seven.

So now you know why I am not really entertained by the idea of a job at strategic position in a strategic company having strategic clients asking it perform strategic roles for them and in turn giving me strategic growth paths in my career.

The Dame's Love: Professionalism or Emotionalism?

I got one more forwarded mails today, I sometimes wonder that what purpose these forwarded mails serve except for informing that sender is still alive and has at least one of his hands in his place so that he can press the forward button. In some cases it is good to know that while in other it doesn’t matters. Though this one triggered made me write this blog

A cute love story.....!!!!!

Two butterflies were in love. One day, they decided to play Hide n Seek during the play
girl Butterfly - "A small game within us"
boy Butterfly - "OK"
girl Butterfly - "The one who sits in this flower tomorrow early in the morning that one loves the other one more....."
boy Butterfly - "OK"
Next morning, the girl butterfly waits for the flower to open so that he can sit before the boy butterfly does.....
Finally, the flower opened.....
What did she see?
The boy butterfly had died inside the flower he stayed there all night so that early in the morning as soon as he sees her he can fly to her and tell her how much he loved her. This is true LOVE Life is LOVE.

This may sound ridiculous and I may sound like a male chauvinist pig (which I don’t mind being tagged) but the women are not worth the love they are given. All this fiasco about love and everything is an absolute crap when you see what has been happening around you especially in this area. The increased professionalism in the fairer sex can be noticed the way the relationships are becoming more professional than emotional. I understand there might be a lot of exceptions to this but the fact is the male counterpart always suffers the irrecoverable loss. The Bharti Yadav issue is one of the glaring examples of what I am talking about. A person, a real living person, was murdered brutally at a very small age. His only fault was that he loved someone who was a daughter of a politician. His fault was that he never cared for the end and just flowed in emotions. What is the end, someone he gave up his life for denies the entire romance in their relationship, when she is supposed to accept it. She says he was just a friend when there is a 20+ Valentines Day photograph album of him and her. Was the love smaller than blood relationship? If she could not take a stand, then why did she start a relationship in the first place? Why allowed things to get so worse and then quit after some one who trusted you with his life.

I know it is not only problem with the females; a lot has been talked about males ditching their girlfriends. But the point I am making is not what males did, they were wrong. All I want to say is it is an equal sin when you break someone’s trust, when you refuse to take a stand where you should have irrespective of you are a guy or a gal. There is lots of talk about how males cannot be trustworthy and how they tend to leave someone they love. Its just that females also do it and they generally get away without making too much of noise. But that is not a right way to go I know a lot of females would be fuming when they read this, but there is no point fuming about it. The best you can do is stand by the person who is willing to stand by you, or don’t get into a relationship first place when you know it. I am still unsure and too immature the question I have raised in my title, but the problem is the question exists.....

MBAs for Sale

With the placement season starting to gear up in the campus, it is time for me to start ranting about the same. The freshly groomed MBAs have been cut, cleaned, polished and now put up for the sale. The prospective bidders have been sent a product catalogue with all the jazzy photographs. Prospective buyers are flocking everyday to enhance the stake of their claims for the young sheep (read students) out for sale. The bet is who will produce more meat. The actual weighing would begin later. The funniest part of this assessing (read interviewing) by the prospective buyers is the reality behind. A typical assessing process happens as follows-

Buyer: Tell me something about yourself?

Sheep: Everything I wanted to tell you is already on the sheet of paper you are holding, it is called a resume. Have you ever seen it before, I guess not. Anyways I will recite whatever I can, hope this will help you to buy me and take me home, please.

Buyer: Tell me something which is not on your CV.

Sheep: Why would I hide anything from you which would enforce your decision to take me or you are interested in how many girlfriends I have had till date or when it was the first time I got drunk in the local bar. No I am not going to tell you any of this I have been prepared for such stupid behavior from you and have left out some points outside that stupid sheet of paper so will recite those. Ps I will recite in such a casual manner, u know I got first prize in acting when I was in class second.

Buyer: Where do you see yourself 5 years down the line?

Sheep: You know if you take me on board today tomorrow I will wake up in the bar with a crazy hangover and if you don’t I will spend whole night reading about the buyer coming tomorrow. So you can figure out what I am doing tomorrow morning, isn’t 5 years a bit too long to predict. Oh yeah!!!! for you, it’s a secret do you know career is very important for me, I fixed up a plan last night going through the career patrh given on your website.

Buyer: Tell me why our company?

Sheep: Its fairly simple you are one of the very few people who would buy me on a cost and still spend on me and would expect me to make phone calls and forward emails whole day. I swear I couldn’t find another idiot like you who would pay me for doing this all my life. Eh you know my inherent interest would create synergies with you. Ever heard this line?

Buyer: What are your weaknesses?

Sheep: Well I simply can not resist good food and sexy women. I hope you don’t have sexual harassment laws in place. Ah Weaknesses I believe in constant updation of the self.

Buyer: What are your favorite subjects in you curriculum?

Sheep: Do you really believe that I might have a favorite subject in the curriculum. What kind of a nerd are you. But you want an answer let me think, which subject you wouldn’t have ever studied and understood. Yes strategies on success of educational institutes on the placement front. Does it help???

Buyer: Any questions you would like to ask?

Sheep: oh yes, I prepared a list I just have it hidden it in my socks wait a second I will read out the questions to you.

Buyer: We like you mr. Sheep would you like to work for us?

Sheep: Obviously, why on earth do you think I am dressed in these stupid ties and blazer. You are not here searching for a groom for your daughter is it? Even if it is then also I am interested.

Buyer: Welcome on board mr. Sheep

Sheep: Righto boss!!! Why don’t you show me the money now? By the way who is my secretary can I ask her to do my fourth semester assignments?

Few Last Words....

I almost killed myself yesterday, not because of the growing trends in MBA crowd to commit suicide. I have no intention to belonging to the elite group of people who had been successful in their great endeavors to be closer to thy almighty. My escapades of yesterday made me realize that though I am not that old to think in these lines, but still something stirs in my stomach, that I might have done with my time. So I think it is a high time that I should tell people that what I felt about this entire gamut around me-

For my mom & dad- mom & dad you people have been the most fabulous people in my life. Irrespective of the time spent with u, it has been the best time. Though I have behaved like an impossible kid sometimes but I never wanted to hurt you. When I will be gone please take care of yourself and try not to remember me much because it will hurt you.

For the woman in my life- I always wanted to be with you at all the crucial moments of life, I am sorry for the things I never told you. I am sorry for leaving you in the mid way. But there are things which you can’t really help.

For my friends- Well you guys, what to say, may be one last joke. Fix your windows and doors, you know I might just decide to comeback. Always remember happy me, I make this request in complete awareness of the sad face that I have and the poor jokes that I used to crack. Please share all my things except my laptop please send it back home and also make sure the things which need to be deleted are deleted from it. You can make a copy if you want to I never objected to do that, pleasure should always be spread. Yes one of you who has the password to my blog please write a post that the author no more exist so that people who visit my blog know of me.

I don’t know why I am writing this but you never know when the lightning strikes.