Thursday, July 17, 2008

10 Reasons to Avoid Marriage

As you would already know from here that my family, extended family and the further extensions of my extended family is all set for the herculean task of getting me married. Interestingly every one I seem to meet has a piece of advice about how should I choose my spouse. The most discussed topic in the purview of my marriage is to take a call between a homemaker and working wife. So here I present a brief extract I got from the discussions happening around me-
5 Reasons not to marry a Homemaker
1- How will she manage to mingle with your circle of professional friends as your friends are blood sucking corporate honchos and they will eat her alive.
2- She would be financially dependent upon you increasing your burden which is actually true as I feel that I am a burden on myself courtesy P.Chidambram for ever increasing inflation and my company’s compensation & benefits team for a meager hike.
3- She would sit back in the house whole day and will watch the KKapoors Saas Bahu Serials and when you come back home the only thing you will get to hear is “Aaj Tulsi ne Mihir ke liye Chole Chawal Banaye
4- The major discussion would revolve around the Super Woman aka Kaam Wali Bai (Housemaid) about which you would have no interest to hear until you have something like Rakhi Sawant kneeling to clean the floor.
5- The kitty parties which would become a common event would haunt you with new jewelry demands and with ever increasing commodity prices might lead you to act bearish in the bullish markets.

5 Reasons not to marry a working woman-

1- She will be very driven towards her career, will not take care of you and she will spend all of her time in office. Yeah absolutely right she will be off to her office at 6’o clock well before I wake up (well any time she would go would actually be before I wake up) and will come only after 2 in the night when I would have slept.
2- She will bore you all day (whatever part of it she is in the house) with her office gossip. You know things like aaj mere office main peon ki Billi mar gayi and his boss sang this song for him, there is something fishy between them I am so sure.
3- She would have male friends which would be a source of trouble; when I always though that her female friends might cause greater troubles making me play Ross Geller.
4- She would time share you laptop to check important mails and you will have to bow to thy request and will also consume the bandwidth you use to play online games and watching you tube videos
5- She would interrupt you in buying gadgets & cars for indulging in Buy & hold positions for depreciating assets in the bullish markets.

So eventually I have 5 not so perfect reasons not to marry a home-maker and 5 not so perfect reasons for not to marry a working woman. Moms, Relatives & the jeevansaathi-dot-coms of the world you got any third types??? Bring it on ;-)

Posted by Prats at 1:12 AM